moment of silence for the time when doctor who didn’t make me want to cut off my own face with a potato peeler
Remembering that Doctor Who irrevocably sucks now keeps on stabbing me in the heart. It’s like missing a step on the stairs and then being told at the bottom that your dog died three years ago and the asshole who shot it went on to taxidermy it inexpertly and now touches himself erotically before the glass-eyed stare of the remaining monstrosity once a week. Meanwhile, people continue to give this man money.
The BBC series Doctor Who ended in 2010. It was replaced by a show called Doctor Who Cares Now That Steven Moffat’s in Charge. The title of the latter show is often shortened for the sake of brevity. This has caused much confusion amongst viewers with many believing that the two series are one and the same.
Today I read an article about Steven Moffat’s Doctor Who in the Arts and Books section of the Independent on Sunday. In this article, by Stephen Kelly, Moffat is criticised for his inability to write women, to complete his plots, to write the Doctor as a likeable and trustworthy figure, and to keep his audience entertained. Yet one line in this frankly scathing (and almost painfully truthful) review reads: ‘When on form, Steven Moffat is the best writer working in television today’.
Having read said article, and written rather a lot of Moffat critique myself, the statement baffled me. Kelly’s entire article is lamenting the current state of Doctor Who at the hands of this man, and yet Moffat is still gifted with glowing praise.
It’s a common theme. I see it often when people are asked to review Moffat’s work. It seems people are almost afraid of criticising him, seeing as he has been lauded one of Britain’s most brilliant television writers.
It’s like the Emperor’s New Clothes. The Myth of Moffat’s Scriptwriting ‘Genius’. It’s a lie we’ve all absorbed and now just assume to be true. Sherlock himself would be frankly appalled by the entire thing. We are seeing, but we apparently do not observe.
Fellow Sherlock watchers will know what I mean (although many will probably not agree) when I equate Moffat’s writing to the empty houses of Leinster Gardens. An empty façade. It looks great from the outside, but when you step closer, you realise it’s just a whopping great train station with some drugged up self-proclaimed sociopath lurking in it.
Let’s examine this case a little closer, shall we?
I wonder who is going to replace Jenna Coleman since she’s not returning to Doctor Who after this series.
A slim white female in her 20s whose casting is based mostly on how attractive Steven Moffat finds her. Next question.
Plot twist: The next companion is a normal girl/boy who only dies once in their lifetime and has no remarkable back story but he thinks they’re wonderful because they are human and the Doctor needs reminding that you don’t need to be a mystery to be remarkable.
so basically we want Donna back
Current Doctor Who is like an ex-boyfriend I used to have a great time with and am still kind of into but lately he keeps being an asshole so it’s awkward every time I see him
#this dialogue was like watching steven moffat give himself a blow job